Saturday, 27 February 2016
From my experience, when you start to walk in your truth, when you decide to put boundaries in your life, when you start to honor your space first you may not appear to those around you like a nice person. You may actually appear like a very selfish one. The reason this occurs is because you start to change and shift and people don't like that. They either have to change themselves to continue to be a reflection of you or you leave them behind, which in turn can bring up lots of negative feelings for them. There are plenty of victims in life and when you shine the light on their bad behavior or no longer tolerate their dramas then they feel they have no other option than to deflect the responsibility of their actions and bad mouth you. Its like being voted off the Island on the game of Survivor! You can loose entire friendship circles, family members, work colleges. It can sometimes feel like a purging by fire only you do not come out Daenerys Targaryen and you are not the Mother of Dragons!
Instead you are left with a lightness which can feel like a void. What are you going to possibly do with all this time now you don't have to sit there in drama? You are going to get out and live the creative life you were born to live, that's what you are going to do. Find your purpose, reconnect with your spirit, do things that make you happy and love those important people in your life that make your heart smile. Embrace the shadow side of yourself, for there is no Yin without Yang. Learn how to read your negative thoughts and pull them apart piece by piece until you locate the real reason why you feel like you do. Self truth is an incredibly confronting thing and it pushes you out of your comfort zone. Not everyone is ready for that, and that is why not everyone is ready to go on a 'spiritual journey'. I'm not going to lie, it can sometimes make you feel very alone especially around those special milestones when you realize that you no longer have enough genuine 'friends and family' to invite to fill a room to help you celebrate.
If being real has lost me friends, then I know the one's I have gained since and continue to meet are the ones I allow to enter into my sacred space. I still struggle and like all humans I have an inner craving to be accepted. The last six years of my life has seemed like a tidal wave, all the old was washed away and I am more confident with who I am and why I am here, and realize that I may not always appear to be 'nice', but I'm okay with that.